Yes – you did read that correct. I never wear underwear. At least not underwear of the traditional type such as briefs or tighty whities. And definitely not boxers.
I’ve hated boxers my whole life. Not the garment itself, but rather the manufacturers extreme incompetence in regards to producing a boxer short that stays in place, is comfortable, and breathable.
You’ve all seen the ad..
The fit hunky guy with PERFECTLY fitting boxers.
Ladies and gents – that image is nothing more than a big fat ILLUSION!
I’ll explain. When you put on your boxers, they actually do stay like that – for a few short seconds. The moment you start moving around, you’re screwed.
As any guy can confirm – it only takes a few minutes until they’ve wedged themselves high up into the creek of Niagara falls, if you know what I mean.
Don’t be fooled to think that you can circumvent this by forking out your hard earned dough for a more expensive brand. Nope. This universal law of nature applies to ONE AND ALL brands of boxers.
I know this from personal experience. A few years ago, I was so sick and tired of this phenomenon that I set out on a mission to find the perfect boxer brand that would rid me of the problem.
After trying brands from the whole spectrum of price ranges and materials, I had to face the hard conclusion that proving the Riemann hypothesis seemed a piece of cake in comparison to manufacturing a good pair of boxers.
So what to do?
The obvious solution unexpectedly appeared during a hard workout. Under my workout shorts, I had, like always, a pair of compression shorts.
Compression shorts are a piece of workout gear that is made of a thin, very durable material with outstanding breath-ability. They are a bit longer than boxers, and designed to stay in place and never wedge. So I asked myself, why not leapfrog the boxer use and go straight into compression instead? I workout almost every day, and that means putting them on at some point during the day anyway. The optimal solution is to completely “cut out the middle man” and go 100% compression the entire day.
No more wedging.
Stays in place.
Creates no lines that can be seen through the pants.
I found that boxers have an average lifespan of 1-2 years. Wear them any longer, and they start looking like something you’ve fished up out of the water close to the Fukushima power plant meltdown. Compression shorts on the other hand, have a life span of AT LEAST 6 years. I still have and use all of the pairs I bought 8 years ago. After 6 years of use in both sports and every day life, the seams on a few of them started to come undone. It was an easy fix with my moms sewing machine, and since the fabric itself was still intact with no holes, I kept them.
I also found that with boxers, they would start to smell less favorable as their age approached 1 year. With compression shorts, this isn’t the case. None of mine smell anything what so ever, even after 8 years of service.
Another important difference is the price. Let’s face it – boxers are quite expensive. A pair of nice looking Calvin Klein or Björn Borg’s sets you back a bit. When the short life span is taken into account, this is a very poor investment. Consider compression shorts instead. The price for a pair is in many cases close to half of what you would pay for a pair of boxers. It’s a no brainer gents!
Lastly, I’d like to share another important benefit and that is that the material dries EXTREMELY fast after a wash! Compared to heavy, water soaked boxers, the light and breathable fabric of compression shorts feels almost dry straight out of the washing machine.
And they tolerate higher temperatures of washing. Try to wash any pair of brand new boxers in higher temperature, and they come out looking like your grandpa’s. The color has lost it’s punch completely and they feel old to the touch. Not so with compression shorts. You can wash them in the highest temperature like bed linen, and they’ll still look brand new.
And they take up less weight and space, so good for traveling.
So there you have it!
ps. Eastbay is currently selling compression shorts for 11.99$ a pair..